Have you ever felt like you are in the middle of a literal whirlwind. Literally like everything around you is spinning and you can do nothing but try to keep yourself anchored to solid ground. Everything you once thought you had a handle on is now flying in a frenzy and you have not way of getting a grasp on anything. Kinda like Elsa in Frozen when she first set off the eternal winter on Arendelle. Everything you have spent so much time, effort and energy in building, preserving and sustaining is coming crashing down.
This is how 30 has been for me; a complete whirlwind. Nah, make that a twister. It seems to have been one thing after another and all I could do was stand there and watch it fall. Not at all how I planned 30 to go. I had major plans to take 30 by storm. To own every room I walked in and to just kill it. But somewhere along the way, I got lost in the whirlwind of life. I became overwhelmed and consumed by my issues. From trying to juggle everything going on in my life to readjusting to myself after having 2 children to an impromptu surgery to a crappy employer. It was a lot and I was drained
Instead of keeping the same energy I started 30 with, I slacked off, became inconsistent. Mostly because I doubted myself. On the front stage, I exuded confidence. But the back stage was in shambles. In all of that, I never stopped. Yes, breaks were taken to destabilize and regroup. A break every now and then are good for anyone.
Just don’t get stuck in the break and never return. One thing that would stick in my mind is a line from Finding Nemo, “just keep swimming.”
No matter how off track I feel or how things look, keep going forward. Wake up everyday and show up. Legacy building isn’t instantaneous. Our current society makes it seem like the road to success is no longer real. That everything can be attained overnight because of the instant access we have with via our phones and the internet.
But life happens in different stages and phases for everyone. That’s why I had to learn that no matter what I still have to show up. I learned and continue to learn so much about myself just by showing up. Resilience, strength and wisdom that I never knew I had or needed. It’s funny how the worst situations can bring the best out of you.
So that’s where I am. 2 months shy of 31. No everything has not magically turned around. Yes there are many daily struggles. But if God can wake me up with new grace and mercy, the least I can do is wake up and make the best of the new day. I can show up and even if the situation is not different I can at least be different.
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